“Things Are Not As They Appear to Be”

“Om Mani Padmi Hum….” with her thump running consistently over the beads of the rosary, Abi Sonam took rest under a tree after doing much around the temple as usual. Without she could make one complete round of rosary, she was mesmerized by a happy couple walking hand in hand down the road far below. She said to herself “Are they really happy as they appear?” She said this because she has already tasted the taste of what it seems to be real and happy in this world.

It was sometimes in 1980s; somewhere in eastern part of Bhutan Sonam was then the student of class four in a small town called Lekithang. Sonam was from a small village called Pemaling an hour walk from her school and was the only child to Aum Lemo and late Aap Dengo. Though she was one of the fortunate children to receive education in that village, she was not very interested in learning as she was challenged with so many dreams and desires burning within her. To describe her in short, Sonam was a beautiful girl and was easily inspired and fascinated by the people and the world around her. She never liked the life of a student; she always wanted to be a good wife and a caring mother whenever she came across a woman mothering their children. She never did realize how miserable it would be to be a mother. On her decision, Aum Lemo said, “ayee... Sonam, we always find grasses on the other side of the hill greener, don’t ever think of becoming mother at this age, your time will come”. She refused her mother as it was her strong decision made. Her close friend Dema also warned “a mirage in the desert areas are not real, just the illusion, you may find happiness now but when you really move into it, you will realize the truth, so better study now than regret later” “No Dema, you go and find your happiness later, I will find my happiness now” was what Sonam replied. So she left school. Students dropping out of schools were common problems in olden days.

Soon Sonam was married to a man called Dendup from Lekithang. Dendup was a village boy. Sonam fell for Dendup as he appeared to be simple and innocent. And within a year Sonam was a mother as she long desired. She enjoyed becoming a mother. In next five years she was a mother of three children and also was six months pregnant. Her mother passed away year after she gave birth to her first child. After she gave birth to fourth baby, their first child died of some illness and the younger baby was ill too. Mr Dendup always goes out to work during day time and used to come home drunk at night. The simplicity and innocent of Dendup has long disappeared. Now Sonam was really experiencing the taste of what it appeared to be happy to her long ago. She always had to suffer the pains herself.

One day she took her daughter, the youngest of three to the hospital as she was seriously ill. When she was inside the hospital, “name of your daughter please?” said the health personal. “Wangmo” she replied. The next question was the name of the mother and father. “Mother Sonam and father Dendup” Sonam replied. The lady stared at her and smiled, “Do you remember me?” Sonam looked somewhat confused but her face seemed familiar to her…..she just smiled and shook her head. “I am Dema” said the lady, “Dema, your friend, don’t you remember?” Sonam blushed out and smiled “Oh Dema…..” she said and they knew each other. “How is your life” asked Dema, so Sonam told her whole story of sufferings. “It was too late to digest your words, I wish I could have only listened to you and my mom” said Sonam weeping. “It’s okay now Sonam, those days are long gone, now it is of no use to regret over it, life is not as easy as you treat. All that glitters are not gold, you may find as simple as they appear but in real they are not” said Dema and she continued “for example you see a spider web, they appear very simple to our eye but you know how much time and energy a spider takes just to stretch one single string of web? Likewise whatever we encounter in our life, they are not as simple as they appear to be” Sonam has got no word to say. Dema with a pause continued “We have to know that colorful mushrooms are always poisonous, do not just   go for it because you find it very beautiful, so now learn from your mistake and teach a lesson to your daughter”. Sonam thanked Dema and went home weeping.

Thereafter Sonam was always critical in judging the world around her. She always thought of raising her only daughter different from how she was brought up. Her other two sons were taken by Dendup’s mother as she was unable to raise them. Just before her daughter could complete her course from JNP, Dendup passed away due to alcoholism. Her two sons got married in the village and a year later Wangmo got job in Thimphu and she was taken with her. Today Abi Sonam realizes how it is important to judge things before going for it. Abi Sonam has learnt that the things are not as they appear to be. This is the lesson Abi Sonam has got to tell to this generation!!!!!!

“Mom, come let’s go”. Abi Sonam looked back and smiled to her daughter Wangmo who has come to take her home. Abi Sonam put her rosary around her neck and walked home with her beloved daughter!!!!!!!!

TRASHEE DEYLEK!!!!!!